The simple choice to play soccer would result in the lesson of a lifetime for Pierce, at the time just a third grader, who learned way too soon that there are people who hide their own vulnerabilities by hurting others. For Pierce, he would soon learn that he had to find his voice to rise above the bully that would meet him each day at school.
"There was one kid in class that was big into football," Pierce, bright-eyed and friendly, explained over a refreshing cup of Menchie's frozen yogurt. "He was taller than me, and acted like he was above me. He made fun of me because I was playing soccer, not football." It wasn't long before other kids became involved and wouldn't talk to Pierce.
As Pierce continued to spell out his story, his mom, Bridget, encouraging him and helping fill in some details, I learned about Pierce's struggle to speak up. He explained how bullies know when they can get away with things, at recess, or behind the teacher's back. And though he would eventually tell his parents about his struggle, how it's hard to catch the bully in action. “They know when to bully,” Pierce said.
"I've always taught my kids to be kind to everyone," said Bridget. "I just expected it to be the same for everyone. But when this happened, reality hits you in the face. As a parent, I felt helpless."
But Bridget said she wasn't going to let her son be the victim, so she knew she had to take action. Communicating with teachers and administrators is a great first step, but giving kids the resources to know how to speak up for themselves is key.
Pierce joined Crabapple Martial Arts which not only teaches self-defense and fitness, but also character and self-confidence. Here, he developed the confidence to know himself well enough not to feel pushed around by his bully and be able to not take his bully's words so seriously.
In addition, Pierce found a local organization that teaches students how they can make a difference by standing up to bullying. Be the Voice gave Pierce the tools he needed to stand up not only against the person bullying him, but also if he saw others being bullied.
"You have to speak up for yourself," he said, "while it is happening. Start calm and soft asking them to please stop, and then speaking louder if necessary."
He encourages students to stand up when they see a bullying situation and say something. The statistic from the Be the Voice website says that 90% of children do not like seeing someone bullied, yet less than 20% try to stop it because they don't know what to do. However, the website states that bullying stops in less than 10 seconds when someone intervenes on behalf of the victim.
Pierce recalled a time when Be the Voice arranged for a Roswell High School football player to come have lunch with him. "He wore his 'Be an Upstander' shirt, handed out bracelets, and asked the group of kids who were bullying to stop," said Pierce.
For Pierce, involvement in both martial arts and the Be the Voice organization gave him the confidence to speak in front of the Roswell Mayor and Rotary Club about the issues of bullying in today's society. He has been able to relay his story and help other kids by giving them the tools they need to speak up.
It's time to teach our kids that they have a voice and that they and their friends can be an "upstander" against bullying. "We need to teach people that words hurt," said Bridget, "and that it's not just sticks and stones. That's false."
Watching Pierce throughout our visit, seeing his eagerness to share his newfound confidence and tools to do his part to stop bullying, was inspiring. His focus was not to dwell on his story, but to focus on how he could help make a difference in kid's lives in our community. He is truly an amazing example of how to turn a bad situation into something more productive.
We can all learn from Pierce and his experience. Both to teach our children how to be kind to one another, but also that we each have a voice to stand up for ourselves and those around us. If you'd be interested in bringing the Be the Voice campaign to your school, please click here to learn more.
